"I didn't even know if I wanted to be alive at the time" - Michael Carter-Williams on facing “bust” label while losing his child and fiancé (2025)

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Personal battles From Rookie of the Year to rock bottom

In 2013, the NBA welcomed a new face with a promise written all over his 6-foot-5 frame. Michael Carter-Williams, fresh off a strong season at Syracuse University, was selected 11th overall by the Philadelphia 76ers.

On opening night, he torched the defending champion Miami Heat with 22 points, 12 assists, nine steals, and seven rebounds — a stat line that announced him as a future star.

But time can be cruel in sports — and flashes of brilliance often collapse under the weight of expectations.

Personal battles

By the time Carter-Williams was making pit stops across the league, from the Milwaukee Bucks to the Charlotte Hornets, from the Houston Rockets to the Orlando Magic, he wasn’t just battling to stay on rosters. He was fighting for something far more elusive—peace of mind in the midst of personal chaos.

“I felt like I had no purpose in life,” Carter-Williams said. “All the noises that you hear from being an athlete, the comments, they was all in my mind. “Most importantly, I wasn’t a father to my child … I didn’t get to be with my fiancée, who I loved and still love. I didn’t know what I wanted. I didn’t even know if I wanted to be alive at the time.”

The weight of expectations isn’t always visible on the surface. But it builds. Carter-Williams spoke of missing crucial moments in his child’s early life, of watching his relationship with his fiancée disintegrate under the strain. The fame, the money, the promise — all of it rang hollow as he spiraled through anxiety and depression.

The player once hailed as the league’s next dynamic floor general soon found himself tangled in a far less glamorous narrative. Instead of soaring, his career dipped into journeyman territory. Injuries, trades, and inconsistent roles followed.

Carter-Williams was slipping through the cracks while the world labeled him a “bust.” The title stung deeper because it attached itself to his professional identity and his sense of self.

In many ways, his descent mirrored that of countless athletes who were never taught how to emotionally recover once the spotlight dimmed. Carter-Williams, like so many others, had tied his identity to performance. And when that faltered, so did everything else.

From Rookie of the Year to rock bottom

Coming into the league, Carter-Williams had all the intangibles scouts salivated over — length, vision, defensive potential. Some draft boards had him projected in the top 10. And when the Sixers grabbed him at No. 11, the reaction was one of optimism.

His rookie season validated the hype. Averaging 16.7 points, 6.3 assists, and 6.2 rebounds per game, Carter-Williams was named the 2013-14 NBA Rookie of the Year.

But the foundation was shaky. His shooting percentages were a touch below par, and the Sixers — then deep in their notorious “Process” rebuild — weren’t in a position to nurture or insulate a young point guard expected to carry the load.

As the years rolled on, the numbers shrank. He went from starting 70 games in his rookie year to bouncing between rotations and G League assignments. He played for six teams in seven seasons. Confidence wavered. The media chatter got louder.

“Depression runs in my family, so it’s hard,” Carter-Williams said. “It’s a hard thing to deal with and at that time, it was just the lowest of me.”

What started as whispers about his jump shot or turnover issues morphed into full-blown character critiques. That’s how it works in professional sports: the machine builds someone up, and once the shine wears off, it begins its slow dissection.

For Carter-Williams, that scrutiny echoed beyond the game. It infiltrated his mental space, frayed his relationships, and forced him to confront demons few knew he was battling.